Down

Writing from the heart can be dangerous; blowing off steam by doing something constructive such as going to baseball practice, blowing routine plays, kicking your glove over the fence, recovering your glove, making routine plays, and then chilling with friends and watching them eat McPuke's is a good way to bringing blood pressure down from volcanic to Cedar Rapids. Well, some of that may not be part of the right way to do things in this regard.

With that said, the language in the following post is strong, and could irk some young and impressionable readers. I don't recommend kids read this blog, so soon after my Winnie the Pooh piece, therefore click and read something else. Thanks for understanding; I'll try to keep from boiling over as I write.

This is a blog what happened on Tuesday night, and in effect what never happened throughout one lifetime.

Unexpectedly, the restaurant side of the neighbourhood Boston Pizza was full, so I waddled through the crowd waiting for tables and entered the bar half of the restaurant. Eating out and alone is nothing new in my experience; people ask for my cellphone number, never use it, and then delete it from their cellphone memory, their personal memories, or in most cases both. Exactly whose design it is by remains a mystery, but I spend most days and nights alone; "if anyone really wants me around, I would already know that" is a common refrain when asked about my 'loner' tendencies.

In any case, I sat alone at the bar of the Boston Pizza restaurant and ordered a Diet Pepsi. After sifting through the menu, I felt someone's eyes walking all over me as I wore brown dragon shoes, jeans, N98 Brazil track jacket, and classic Brewers baseball cap. The person was close - really close, perhaps a couple feet away. The penetrating stare was all one could take, but that person did pause to gulp from the second bottle of beer the bartender offered earlier. I tried watching the massive mega screens of TSN and Sportsnet channels above the bar, but the eyes were still glued to me, literally. Unable, or perhaps unwilling to speak, the person's stare shifted from gaze to awkward winking to all-out creepy behaviour. Instead of a full meal, I ordered French Onion soup, changed my seat, paid the ball, and booked it for home! It was the most humiliating moment of my life, not because this blatant, awkward, inappropriate, and open show of "affirmation" came from a man, but because he was also a drunkard.

At first, there is embarrassment: To be the subject of a dehumanizing and destructive experience like that. Upon second guessing the event and what took place there is second guessing of the subject of the terrible experience. To read more into what happened is a mistake, but what happened must be put in proper perspective: A drunk found me 'attractive'. When people are sober, no one says a word to me, or at the very least knows who or where I am. I quit Facebook because in getting people to care who or where I was, I discovered how annoying and difficult I really was. That was six months ago, and it comes as little surprise how little I am missed. However, if you get a man or woman intoxicated, then I have the potential to be their next squeeze.

Reduced to nothing, spirit crushed, and identity questioned: No young woman EVER looked at me, and the best I could do was a drunkard who wouldn't otherwise. I can't tell you the number of high school dances and formals and prom events I skipped because no girl would EVER want to go with me, but like the awkward, obese high school kid with the nappy hair and horrible fashion sense, I am 'good enough' for the weird intoxicated fool staring at me from the end of the bar. I can pray, like I have for the last fifteen years of my life since the beginnings of puberty, but when I open my eyes the score remains the same, and nothing EVER changed.

If there must always be a winner, then there must definitely be a loser. No matter how much a person desires and enables the mechanisms for change, it never comes. Perhaps I will remain down FOREVER; after all, no young woman up there would EVER think of coming here.

Disclaiming Movie Star Glasses Girl

I am one of the last people you should listen to about building relationships. How can someone, who was never in a relationship, tell anyone else about why building a relationship with Movie Star Glasses Girl or any girl, for that matter, is important? I don't want to be the guy who dispenses advice in some weekly column for 15 cents a word, when he says he wants to "enhance your people skills" or "improve your love scent" (Yuck).

I'm not a professional, and taking serious note of what I wrote about the Movie Star Glasses Girl in your life without consulting friends or professional people is plain wrong. I don't pretend to know EVERYTHING, but I do know a responsible, honest, and nice guy in all situations doesn't sleep worried (A nice guy will get roughly five-seven hours of sleep Monday-Friday).

There are even some nice guys out there who are considering throwing in the towel just so they can sleep less than the prescribed amount! As the late 49ers head coach Bill Walsh once wrote on the chalkboard in the team meeting room: DON'T BE THAT GUY (The context may be a little different, but I'm sure that is what he was talking about...being nice). If you be nice to Movie Star Glasses Girl just because she is Movie Star Glasses Girl, then Movie Star Glasses Girl will see through you even without her Movie Star Glasses. However, if you treat every person like Movie Star Glasses Girl, or better still like family, then the headache of figuring you out will be that of Movie Star Glasses Girl.

I miss Bill Walsh; he is one of my favourite NFL coaches (Lombardi, Landry, Walsh, Parcells...Yes, I said Parcells!)



The highlights in the film end at 1:39, just so you know.

Winnie and Losing: My Hatred For and Failure to Understand Winnie the Pooh

This is actually the third attempt at posting this article because the good folk at Blogspot are fans of Winnie the Pooh, and I have a feeling they are out to get me! Anyway, here it goes...

I was driving around my hometown this week, when I saw this on the side of the movie theatre: "Oh no." I said.

I hate Winnie the Pooh, I never liked Winnie the Pooh, I could never understand Winnie the Pooh, I found the Winnie the Pooh books to be verbose, I believe the Winnie the Pooh television shows/hour-long television features/straight-to-DVD movies/feature-length films to be repetitive, and I find sorting individual grains of sand by height for the next seven hundred years to be more exciting and productive to the furtherance of humanity than one minute of watching that idiot bear digging for honey.

The lazy bear, the pathetic pig, the arrogant owl, the whining rabbit, the annoying tiger, the invisible kangaroos, the attention-seeking donkey, the big-headed Christopher Robin with no friends, and now...a balloon?! REALLY?

In my university days, I would discuss the merits and values of Mister Rogers' Neighbourhood, and I would routinely run into fellow students and teachers who more than frequently shared their displeasure for Mister Rogers. I could never understand why, but I accepted it. Their points were thoughtful, concise, and some felt weirded out by the "Neighbourhood" experience. It was in the student centre cafetorium when the following occurred: My friends were decrying my love of the "Neighbourhood", and questioned how I could watch such a program. Towards the end of the debate, I uttered "I know lots of people, some of which were my best friends, and how they don't like the "Neighbourhood" as well". Then, to offer a similar example of something I disliked with a passion fruit, I said "I don't like Winnie the Pooh."

The chatter of the cacophony of conversation within the cafetorium ceased, parents sitting next to their kids covered the ears of the young 'uns, books fell from the hands of studying students to the floor, ceramic plates dropped and smashed into pieces, teachers fainted, the chaplain prayed for my lost soul, and one of the larger students banished me from the Student Centre for three days, or at least until I learned the error of my ways and beg forgiveness. That was seven years ago, and while one of those reactions was false, I did draw the ire of many a student at the University of Toronto as "The Fallen One" for "speaking blasphemy and questioning the divine origin of all things of Saint Winnie the Pooh".

I can't believe I'm doing this, but I'm embedding the trailer onto my blog so I can see if my suspicions are true, and the film is a reworked copy of something they drew up years ago.



I was right. It is the same thing. I'm not going to Winnie this battle, am I?

Forgetting Movie Star Glasses Girl

Eventually, after mixing signals and making conversations, there must be a time to choose: Say your piece, or turn and walk away. No doubt that girl, who wears those movie star glasses, is onto the scheme and will do everything she can to avoid that moment. Perhaps she doesn't want to hurt you with what, at the moment, may sound like "bad news", or she isn't interested in anything you say.



In any event, if after trying every non-creepy idea to get the attention of Movie Star Glasses Girl, then it is time to move on. You don't want to FORGET and BE A JERK TOWARD her altogether, but at the same time chasing ghosts is the last thing to do. Wish Movie Star Glasses Girl the best, and put all that drive, focus, and attention into something worthwhile.

Right now, I'm learning piano. It's not as easy as I thought it would be o_O However, I'm just going a song at a time. I don't want to start on Beethoven's 5th Symphony; that would be silly...although...?

Understanding Movie Star Glasses Girl

After waking up early, showering, shaving, hitting each armpit with a band of Clinical anti-perspirant, wearing a tie and that bright orange track jacket kept in the back of the closet, and donning a matching hat, the time for greeting comes. Praying and centering thoughts keep the mind focused on this "great" conquest: "Discovering" America, setting foot on the Moon, and talking to Movie Star Glasses Girl go down in history as some of humanity's greatest accomplishments. There is one problem: She cannot be found, and there is another girl sitting in her spot on the bus!

Wait a minute, Movie Star Glasses Girl isn't Movie Star Glasses Girl all the time; it's cloudy today, and those Movie Star Glasses she always wears detach from her face. Now she looks completely different, and eye-catching...more so o_O

As staring isn't attractive and may land the "viewer" in jail, try noticing other things about what she is passionate about, things that set Movie Star Glasses Girl apart, and make her unique. For one, the music from her headphones is really loud, which ironically defeats the purpose of headphones. That does not mean calling her out on it is the right thing! Nevertheless, the beat seems catchy enough, so silent drumming is acceptable, yet only for a couple stanzas. Also, keep an eye on the book she is reading with that surprising look of intensity, which can be found in the eyes of Mike Singletary and my older sister during her U.S. collegiate basketball days. The title or subject matter, within reason, can spark a conversation with her down the road. As stated earlier, staring is creepy. If offering respect is important, then remember to show some respect to Movie Star Glasses Girl, so neither of you crash and burn over an awkward and embarrassing incident.

While she may look like a Movie Star, behind those movie star glasses is a person with faults and shortcomings like everyone else; all the same, Movie Star Glasses Girl should be treated with the same level of respect. Unlike everyone else, however, if she becomes that sole Movie Star in life, then treating her like one goes a long way, too.

Relating to Movie Star Glasses Girl

Concerning the previous blog entry about "Busy Movie Star Glasses Girl", if talking to her isn't possible that day, then find out what she is reading! If you read and research the same book, you will have something to discuss with her in case she is reading that book on a later date.

This post was as sort as a reply, but too important to be hidden at the bottom of another page. To the library ^_^ (Don't you mean Chapters?) o_O ... ^_^ Yes...

Busy Movie Star Glasses Girl

Remember the old slogan, "Pick Your Battles"? Well, when Movie Star Glasses Girl is busy or reading a book, please remember to be patient. Should such a case arise, this may trigger a memory about learning guitar fingerings for that song you are learning to play. It always helps to have something to do, so have it at hand: Don't just yank it out whenever "that moment" with Movie Star Glasses Girl is not present. If luck should change, it could serve as a conversation tool when she finishes whatever she is doing.

On a sidenote, today's cellphones are equipped with all sorts of gadgets. Whether they play music, record videos, or play an elaborate ringtone for each different person that calls, cellphones can do lots of cool stuff, and they also do lots of damage.

Be careful, not only how you use your cell phone, but where you use it. Holding it up directly at someone isn't HIP, even if you aren't using the camera feature :( Plus, refrain from using it at restaurants or public meeting places, unless you are at a Deadmau5 concert. No one calls my cell phone, but whenever I need to make a call or text someone I just use my phone wherever I am; there may come a situation where that's not cool, and someone could misinterpret something :( Please exercise caution when using cellphones. Potentially, there could be serious social and legal ramifications even when making an innocent phone call to your mom. With that said, be safe out there :) Happy Dialing :D

Finding Movie Star Glasses Girl

How would one get someone's attention on the city transit bus, or subway car for that matter? Opening statements such as "Hi there; check out my ride", or "the number five is a cool bus, isn't it" don't actually work. Plus, passengers are reluctant to make eye contact with any or all strangers on the bus, unless there is a platonic if not mutual level of attraction flowing between them (Is platonic the right word? Oh well, I'm using it). Disney movies and teen dramas market this "flowing" in each of their television shows and movie premieres; this author calls this Zac Efron Syndrome, which ironically doesn't exist ;)

There is always one girl wearing movie star glasses, who sits in the same spot on the same bus to work everyday, and all but refuses to acknowledge cheesy, silent, and subtle hand gestures or make eye contact. Indirectly, Movie Star Glasses Girl challenges strangers and the prospective lucky dude to utter a sound, and potentially face scorn and ridicule for doing so. Public speaking is the most feared of all social phobias: If the subject is important and there is a passion for transmitting ideas from one person to another, then there is an expectation to speak and communicate those ideas to another person.

In Britain, more than half of London's population met someone in the city's transit or "Tube" system. Also, for a significant percentage of Britons, those initial greetings with a random gent or lady turned into a meaningful, long-term relationship. When asked what was said, respondents in the British social survey said they made simple conversation by starting out by saying things like "Going my way?" There was nothing elaborate or romantic about the initial dialogue, just someone with confidence not being afraid of asking someone for help or starting a conversation about something else.

I'm sure Movie Star Glasses Girl receives the cheesiest pickup lines from all sorts of guys o_O She already knows she is "stinking attractive" because guys tell her goofy stuff like that all the time. Instead, start a conversation with her about something other than how she looks or what her ring size is; I'm sure Movie Star Glasses Girl would appreciate the fact someone she doesn't know values her opinion. Genuine statements of affection will come later, but for right now focus on treating Movie Star Glasses Girl like a real person first with a brain, and someone worth listening to ^_^

Before I forget, in case Movie Star Glasses Girl is reading this blog post, I hope you noticed me noticing you, and perhaps later we can talk about our opinions of other things we notice...like the taste of the coffee you are drinking, the lowlighting of coffee shops in the winter time, or how much we like The Nearly Deads and Charles and Alli Trippy (I thought I would slide in that #CTFxC reference ^_^ LOL)

Nintendo 64 Memories

I'm shopping for a new N64 console because my old one died a year ago due to inactivity. I searched through my old collection of games like Mario Kart 64, Starfox 64, and Star Wars: Episode 1 Racer, and decided to check if I still had the "old magic".

I also remember those other games I used to hate like Snowboard Kids and Snowboard Kids 2: Aside from Contra, they are the most broken games of all-time. In a race against the computer, in any level, at any stage in a race, the moment your character moves into first place he is hit with every mind-numbing and time-wasting attack you can think of. If your character is not a snowman, then it is suddenly passed by a computer character with a hidden boost.

1. "Infinite Mushrooms" Computer Cheat: You can tell the computer has it in for you when this occurs three seconds after you pass a computer character: They suddenly appear ahead of you without aid of a power-up. This is more prevalent in video games, in which the settings are set to high difficulty.
2. "The World Hates Me!" Computer Cheat: Otherwise known as the "Second Item" computer cheat where, not only do the computer characters boost past you, but all of them simultaneously hit with every kind of power-up imaginable. Snowboard kids was notorious for this, and caused many a tantrum >_<;

I spent a lot of time playing video games, and I could not imagine then being where I am now, not just in the business sense, but physically as well. I could discuss my social standing in high school, or lack thereof, but that was only one of many factors that played into early obesity. Friends may call it "being chubby", but I was a complete slouch; according to Momzo, I am still a slouch about some things, but I was HUGE back then.

Video games helped me "escape" my HUGE body and become someone else. A person others could depend on to save the day or win the big race. In terms of productivity, I fell behind and I am working to catch up to those younger than me in that regard. Socially speaking, there are some sins, which while they are forgiven, will never be forgotten and serve as reminders of how empty life can be if you refuse to make an effort and hide within creature comforts.

It would be nice to see if I can beat my old records in Star Wars Racer, and see if the five-time City Champion can make it six. Where are you at, Tanya? ^_^ There you are! (Phil finds his old red N64 Controller with old Zeon stickers in a box of old video games)

Weekend Wrap-Up

What did I do last weekend? I drove...
Where was I last weekend? I'll tell you...

I decided to take Friday off because I was going to have a busy weekend being out and about the Greater Toronto Area. However, the crazy taxi driving game began on Thursday:

1. Thursday Morning: Concord, ON.
2. Thursday Afternoon: South Brampton, ON.
3. Thursday Evening: Eating out in Mississauga, ON.
4. Friday Afternoon: Shopping, Part 1 in Mississauga, ON.
5. Friday Evening: Baseball in Clarkson, ON (SW Mississauga).
6. Saturday Afternoon: Shopping, Part 2 in Mississauga, ON.
7. Saturday Evening: Harvest Bible Chapel, Oakville, ON.
8. Saturday Night: Eating out in Mississauga, ON.
9. Sunday Morning: Harvest Bible Chapel, Brampton, ON.
10. Sunday Afternoon: Softball League Meeting at Mississauga Chinese Baptist Church, Etobicoke, ON.
11. Sunday Evening: Youth Service at Sheridan Park Alliance Church, Mississauga, ON.

Everything that occurred on Thursday was work-related; aside from this, I enjoyed being everywhere else last weekend. By Sunday afternoon, however, I was really tired and I was thankful I didn't get into any accidents while I was driving.

I did have an incident on Thursday when I went out to eat; I forgot my wallet! Thankfully, I wasn't too far away from my house, and the manager knew me. Take note, readers, don't drive at 300 kilometers per hour in residential streets just for a wallet; make sure you have everything you need before a night out on the town ^_^ When I returned to the restaurant, I paid the bill and left a good tip as an extra apology for the awkwardness o_O I hope my absent-mindedness doesn't increase with age, or I may be in BIG trouble.

51st Post

Today marks the 67th anniversary of the Allied landings on the beaches of Normandy in France on June 6, 1944. Salute servicemen and women, past and present, for their contribution and sacrfice in keeping us "strong and free".



Finally, to those who paid the ultimate sacrifice in giving their lives so we wouldn't have to, all I can say is thank you.

Writing Weekend Wrap-Up & "Don't be a CREEP, Part 2"

I decided to start writing again ^_^ Whenever I try writing a long poem or narrative, something occurs at work or in life which pulls me away from what I want to write about. Then, when I return to it, I am so far removed from the thought process, which brought me to that stage in my work, I forget what I wrote about to begin with! o_O Same goes for reading; I have many unfinished books.

I wrote "junk" stories in the past, but those were for me and hardly worth publishing. About one or two weeks later, I delete them and start over from scratch. This time, I want to write something thoughtful and insightful like the French-Canadian comic book I submitted for French class back in eighth grade (it was about three lizards named Gorgo, Titan, and Bronco).

When I type "write" I mean I will actually write stuff down on paper! Typing this out on computer screens or on the iPad is the newest craze, but you don't get the infamous glare from ruled sheets of 8.5"x11" that you would normally get from your computer monitor. Along with the satisfaction of taking your work with you to the office, manuscript doesn't need to be plugged in or a battery to work! #WINNING...well, almost...I haven't started yet.

I will try to finish before the Toronto Maple Leafs win the Stanley Cup, otherwise this may take awhile.

DON'T BE A CREEP!

I have a habit of texting friends at random with messages like "Hi!" and "Hey!". While this my look innocent, some friends do not expect to receive messages from those of us who are largely AWOL during the week. Texting your friends, who did not see since graduation years ago, isn't a good idea either, as I found out this week -_- Since leaving Facebook, my creepiness level decreased about 200% and my average email length also decreased about fivefold. However, my fear of not being heard, and the need to communicate with other human beings at random times of the day increased about...300% (rough estimate).

Hopefully, I don't offend anyone else in my dwindling circle of REAL friends with my CREEPY TEXTS o_O Say NO to CREEPY TEXTS!